I was talking with my friend Stanley the other day about a small problem I was having. *For new readers to this humble column, Stanley, is my garbage man/philosopher friend who is a profound observer of the human condition and one of the greatest thinkers I’ve ever met. My problem was about how to tastefully (perhaps that’s not the right word to use) discuss such a hard [sorry!] and very crucial issue such as constipation without straining [sorry!] or offending any of my treasured readers’ delicate sensibilities. After all, constipation just isn’t something that is discussed in polite company. And as he always does, however, Stanley had the answer.

He reminded me, that first of all, I was a doctor, and that doctors are supposed to talk about this stuff like constipation. Bowel movements are life and death important! Secondly, he reminded me that one of the more less-notable side-effects of the Clinton Presidential Administration was that personal topics that were historically considered taboo with regards to decent public discourse, suddenly became part of our nation’s collective awareness. From the press conferences in which President Clinton discussed his personal choice of underwear with teenage girl interviewees, to embarrassed parents having to scramble for answers to their kid’s questions of just what exactly the big deal was concerning Ms. Monica, our great country found itself bound-up [sorry!] in an all-time lowering of public and private standards from which it has yet completely recovered. And so with those thoughts in mind, I’ll just get things moving [sorry!], and boldly go [sorry!] where no Veterinary Blogger has gone before.

I’ll begin by saying that your pet’s bowel movements are an important reflection of its overall health. By definition, constipation (dyschesia is the medical term) is the inability of your pet to perform a bowel movement (defecate, pooping, crapping are other words that can also be used.) In any discussion I have about constipation, one of the first questions people always ask me in regards to their pet’s bowel movements is, “how much and how often is normal?” The answer is, “whatever is normal for your pet.” From conversation I have with clients on the subject, twice a day seems to be the average frequency for bowel movements. But please keep in mind that once every two or three days is not uncommon either. “Nothing in, nothing out” as the old saying goes, is very appropriate, especially in dogs. If they eat a lot, they will poop out a lot.

Dogs and cats that are constipated most often will look and act like their having difficulty in defecating. They hump-up like they gotta go but nothing comes out. Often they will cry out in pain. This behavior is important to keep in mind because I get quit a few phone calls and office visits from clients who feel their pets are constipated just because they haven’t had a movement for a couple of days. Sometimes they’re bound-up, but most of the time they just haven’t pooped because they didn’t need to. In advanced cases of constipation, the pets will begin vomiting.

The causes of constipation in dogs (and cats) are many. They could have impacted or infected anal glands. Impacted anal glands leads to severe discomfort during defecation and, ultimately, to constipation. Some medications and drugs can cause constipation. On long-haired dogs, feces can become entangled in the fur around the butt and physically block the flow of feces. With these pets, it’s important to keep them groomed. Another cause of constipation are swollen prostates in un-neutered male dogs.

But almost exclusively, the biggest cause of constipation I see is when the poor critter consumes more bones than is good for it. The consumed bones splinter as they are chewed, and these fragments then become like sharp knives sticking out of the sides of the feces which then cause the dog tremendous pain. And the list goes on: psychological stress, dehydration due to insufficient water consumption, lack of fiber in the diet, etc. And I’m outta room Thanks again. PS: If you were offended by Stanley’s political commentary, address the hate mail to him, not me. His address is: stanleythegarbageman@google.com